Knothead and Splinter need help in their history lesson, and Woody digresses to tell them of their illustrious ancestors, starting with the caveman woodpecker who captured his mate. He tells of one family member in ancient Greece who mistook the columns of a temple for trees and caused the present-day picturesque ruins. Woody explains how another ancestor caused the Leaning Tower to lean; the collapse of the Roman Coliseum’s wall; the disappearance of the nose on the Sphinx; an ancestor who was a matador in Spain; Woodpecker Raleigh, who introduced the king-size cigarette; a family member who rode the Mayflower; another who chopped down the cherry tree and didn’t tell a lie; a great-granduncle named Wyatt Urp out West; and the story of Apache Woodpecker, who strolled in Gay Paree. When Woody’s story ends, the kids want to match their ancestors’ adventures, but what a disappointment when he tells them that they’ll merely take a trip to the Moon- this is old stuff.
